It is a little after four on this beautiful November afternoon – or perhaps I should already call it evening, because the sun has set.
Each day, we walk with quiet steps toward the darkest time of the year, and each day grows shorter than the one before it, until Yule, the time of light, comes once again.
Just after the sun disappeared beyond the horizon, I went outside with my daughter to light our traditional Samhain fire, marking a light within this autumn darkness. It is a custom we have followed for years: during the darkest part of the year, from Samhain until Yule, we keep a fire burning to protect us and to show us, always, where our home is.
Amid the chaotic confusion of electric light, sound, and noise in the modern world, we forget that our roots lie in nature and in the twilight that wraps us each autumn in its peaceful and beautiful cloak.
When we finally return to our roots for a moment, entering the dimness of the autumn forest, we lose our sense of time and place, and we do exactly as we should. We forget all the disorder of the modern world, with its Facebooks and Twitters, and melt into the forest we have entered.
Everyone has their roots and their home somewhere.
For us wanderers of nature, it is often a particular place or element within nature.
For me, it is the forest.
I find my home in the dim and dark forest, and I am not afraid there. I may sit for hours in the middle of nowhere, listening as the forest tells me its story, leaving behind everything the human world expects of me—almost demanding that I remain constantly connected to the internet, my phone, and the news.
That is not me.
I am the solitary watcher of moonlight, sitting on a pier beside the lake, listening to nature and whispering with the forest in the darkness.
As November, the month of spirits, passes once again, I sink into my thoughts and reflect upon my life. In this life, I have not needed to store food for winter, dry meat, or seal the gaps in my cabin against the cold. Yet as winter approaches, the need to do these things still rises in my mind.
Today, I came across the finest compliment I have received from a stranger in a long time.
While wandering through Google, I found a discussion on the demi.fi forum where someone had written:
“Do not insult Unenkulkija. He knows what he is talking about, and he truly is a good person.”
It was touching to find such words from a completely unknown wanderer, discovered entirely by accident, and they warmed my heart.
Thank you for your words, Mewwies. That small sentence left me in a good mood for the rest of the day.
I do not know whether I would describe myself as such a good person, but it is pleasant to discover that someone genuinely thinks so. I have always been accustomed to being the one who stands alone against the entire world, and sometimes that makes me feel lonely in a way that is difficult to explain.
Outside, it is already completely dark, and the time is nearly half past four in the evening.
It is time to light a few candles in here as well and listen to the world for a little while longer.